Dyke Style Update! (aka 'The Balls In Her Mouth')

Tramps!

Does this ever happen to you?

"I always hit on the wrong girls."

"My gaydar sucks.  I had no idea she was the queer one at the table."

"I wish there was something chicks wore that automatically meant they were lesbians."

by fraanzi via deviantart

Fuuuuuuuuck. 

Dykes, this may be your past, but it does not need to be your future. 

There is something girls wear that means they're homos.

And I can't believe we've never talked about it.

Queerettes are advertising themselves all over the damn place - right under your nose! 

via alternatexrealities

And all without obvious rainbow tattoos or gayass t-shirts.

So here it is. 
Simple. 
An alarmingly easy way to tell if the girl you're looking at likes boobies as much as you do. 

I give you...

The ball-ring piercing.

Boom!
You're welcome.

Gay girls are 115.6% more likely than straight girls to have this kind of jewelry in their faces.  S'truth.
 
Here's why the ball-ring piercing is for homos only:

1) Lesbians love love love piercings.  Lip rings, eyebrow-piercings (so 90s!), monroes, nose rings, labrets, septums.  You name it, dykes love it.

via Deanna Templeton

2) More lesbians have obvious piercings than straight girls.  (Maybe because we're used to pain? *tear*) We're already not getting married to boys...fuckit, let's pierce our faces. 
Gramma's already pissed.

                                                                     via hipsterdykes
3) Lesbians like metal-ly shit.  Metal-ly shit that looks like it belongs in a toolbox.  You know, hardware. 
We've talked about this:
http://effingdykes.blogspot.com/2009/03/dyke-style-update.html

4) The ball-ring piercing looks obvious, tough, and a little bit like a tool.  
It says "androgynous."
It says "I'm no stranger to pain - this was nothing."
It says "Fuck you and your sparkly butterfly belly-button piercing."

Sometimes gaydar is just too easy. 

If you see a woman with a piercing like this:

She is likely a homosexual. 
(At least you've got a fighting chance.)


Little metal ball = gay.

Straight girls, take that shit out immediately! 

You are confusing us.


Ball-ring piercings are G-A-Y.

Gay!